I won’t marry a Rape Victim…

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Taranya Keeren

A very hot issue being discussed in not just our country but around the world today is no, not GST but rape. The outcry for rape begun when a college girl in Delhi, was brutally raped and was left for death in the year 2012. After a while it died down but the flames were started once more when BBC decided to make a documentary about it and despite India’s best effort to stop it, it was leaked in YouTube.

I watched it and I was really disgusted by the accused and their lawyers as well. They have no remorse. Now let’s forget about India and come to Malaysia since I am from here. Recently I came across a video on Facebook about a social interview by Astro on what the Indian community in Malaysia think about safety for women and rape victims.

When I started watching that video, I was so sure that Malaysian Indian (because they only interviewed Indian men and women) men were going to make me proud by saying that they will marry rape victims. Oh my, I was sadly in for a very rude awakening. I am not saying all men are of those opinion but let’s talk about those who were interviewed.

These men were asked if they would marry a rape victim? And some of them said no, they wouldn’t. Their excuses were so flimsy, that you could have stitched a costume for Sunny Leon in it. One guy actually said that his family’s reputation might take a hit. A LADY said that although it’s not the victim’s fault, still people wouldn’t accept her. And another guy said that he would have to answer a lot of questions pertaining to this if people got to know that he married a rape victim thus he would not marry one. Only one guy was man enough to say he would marry a rape victim. Kudos to you man whoever you are, you have just saved a lot of Malaysian men’s reputation.

So now that we have got that out of the way, let’s get down to business. To all men and women out there, what is rape? Rape is when a woman or a man (yes it’s shocking but men can be raped too!) have had sexual intercourse forced upon them without their CONSENT. Now the operative word here is consent. What is consent? It means permission.

Orang- orang yang pandai (smart people), if a person was raped; it means it happened without their permission, PERMISSION! Why should someone suffer because of the actions of another? A rape victim has never asked to be raped. Get it? Get it? It was forced upon them.

Dear Malaysians, please understand that rape is not something which can be brushed off. It is a very despicable thing to do to a person. You are violating their basic liberty. A lot of people comment that women shouldn’t wear provocative clothes or go out after certain hours or ‘don’t ask for it’ (I have no idea what on earth that means). Let me ask you a question, ‘are we freaking living in the middle ages?’ why on earth a women shouldn’t wear shorts? Why do men wear shorts? Cause the want to provoke the women? NO! It’s because it’s blistering hot in Malaysia people. Some people feel comfortable wearing shorts so that they don’t get drowned in their sweat. Trust me they don’t want to make you horny. That’s just your imagination. Same goes for singlet and other clothing.

Why shouldn’t a woman go out at night? I mean in between working, taking care of kids, doing chores, cooking and cleaning, the only time a woman can actually meet her friends is at night. Why is it when a man could walk freely at night, a women can’t? Are men so hard up that they practically can’t see women walking about? Is that the excuse? Because that is just utter nonsense!

People! Stop blaming the victim!

The victim did not ask to be raped. It’s the assailant who should be blamed. It’s the assailant’s choice which made the crime happen not the choice of the victim. It’s the mentality of the society which enables a rapist to walk with his head held high while the rape victim walks with shame.

Public justice. A recent incident in Kelantan where public punished the rapist before he was handed over to the police. A 13 year old girl was raped by this guy and his friend.

Parents, please teach your children to respect women and men. Teach them it’s not right to rape a person. Teach them that it’s not the victim’s fault but the rapist’s. A lot of victims don’t come out and report the crime committed against them due to the mentality that their family might face shame or that they will have to face shame. Thus it makes it so much easier for rapists to commit and get away with their crime. This has to stop! Rape is not a game. It is a crime. A grievous crime.

Remember, rape can happen to anyone, even you. So before you sit there high and mighty and judge a rape victim, always remember it can also happen to your girlfriend, boyfriend, wife, husband, sister, brother, daughter, son, mother or your father. Rape can happen to anyone and it is not funny. Please respect rape victim. They are human too. They too deserve respect. Thank you.

Taranya Keeren